Can I just say, in real simple words, 2012 has kicked my ass and I'm so done with bad things happening in my life! Seriously, I'm not a sad person whose life is full of drama, but my goodness, I've been incredibly sad and full of angst for so much of this year. To be fair, things beyond my control have happened that have given me valid reasons to be sad...Tim (my cat) died, then a month later my dear friend died suddenly, which sent me reeling into a tailspin that I was only just beginning to come out of when we experienced a family emergency of another sort and I was sent reeling again. Then, I switched jobs a month ago and on my second day of work I received a call that my beautiful cousin was on life support and they were waiting until my siblings and I could get to the hospital (2 hours away and I couldn't go until after work) to disconnect. She was 46 and she was that cousin, you know, the one who is everybody's favorite. She was certainly my favorite.When I think about her I can hear her laugh and see her smile...her death was tragic and it breaks my heart still to think that she is gone.
Really? Are you freaking kidding me? Where did all this crap come from? And why was it all piled up in a few short months? My gosh....I'm so done with it. No. More. I'm crying Uncle! The universe can just go away and leave me in peace for the rest of the year. I mean it!
Anyway, all that to say I've been gone, but I am back. Different, slightly wounded and still hurting, but I'm back. I camped by myself Friday night and paddled with friends on Saturday...that helped as it always does. I'm digging deep and readjusting my priorities. That's always a good thing, but I'm pretty good at doing that without this much pain, thank you very much.
So, here's to a more peaceful 2nd half to the year. I pray she's gentle with me.